Today marks 133 days since I quit social media. It was time. I’d had enough. I got a surprising amount of push-back from my friends on social media when I told them I was cutting the umbilical cord.
“I could never do it,” many of them admitted.
Others wished me luck, then added wryly, “See you back again in a month!”
Several people shared their personal experiences, mostly along the lines of, “Oh I tried that once. I missed everybody too much.”
One overwhelmingly popular question seemed to be, “But how will you keep in touch with friends and family?”
What I heard over and over again in my head was the old addict’s argument: I can quit anytime I want; I’ve done it hundreds of times!
What’s my experience really been like though, all these months into it? In a word…easy.
I thought there would be withdrawal. I thought there’d be cravings. I thought there’d be remorse and regret. Nope. Turns out I haven’t missed it at all. Other members of my family are still jacked into the Matrix—my wife, my kids, even my parents. That’s cool. I’m not preachy about my decision. I did it because I felt like I had to. It’s not like I joined the Church of the Apocalyptic Luddites or anything and live now solely by candlelight and hand-crank radios in my bunker of rifles and stock-piled food. I wish no harm or misfortune upon those who still nurse on the teats of Jack Dorsey/Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg. It just ain’t for me. I done been weaned.
My family still shares with me information they find on Facebook. Some of my favorite authors talk about their recent Twitter posts. My hands don’t start shaking. I don’t get night sweats. My teeth don’t chatter. I don’t hunt down some shady dude in the 7-Eleven parking lot and pay him money to let me sniff his cell phone screen.
Life off social media, at least for me, has been wonderful. Do I miss my family and friends? I guess my answer to that comes in the form of a Jeopardy answer: “What is … was I really interacting with them in the first place?” For those who argued it’s the only way they keep in contact with their family and friends, I kind of scratched my head. Really? Sharing cat memes and arguing about armchair politics is really how you share your life with your family and friends? That’s simplistic, I know, and I’m sure there’s more to it than that.
“Fine, Mister Goody-Two-Shoes Morgan, just how do YOU keep in touch with family and friends?”
I call them. We talk occasionally. Before I left social media, I gave everyone all my contact information and various ways of reaching me if they ever wanted to get in touch. Few of them actually have. Granted, that might not be their fault. Because of how Facebook’s algorithms work, most of my friends and family probably never even saw my posts to begin with. Most of them probably never saw I was leaving. Fewer of them probably got my contact information. Many of them might at this very moment be wondering, “What ever happened to Morgan? Did he get the ‘Rona and die?”
It’s been really nice not being so consumed with finding a witty thing to share every hour. It’s been even nicer not being so consumed with, “Has anyone commented or liked my post yet? How about now? How about now?”
I’ve had more time for me. Maybe that sounds selfish. I don’t think it is. There are lots of things about me that I need to work on, things I want to do, stuff I want to accomplish. I have more time for that now and it’s nice. My life is quieter now, more peaceful.
“But how do you stay in touch? How do you know what’s going on?”
I don’t always, and honestly, that’s perfectly fine. I don’t have to know every little thing that’s going on in the world. Social media has a way of making everyone feel like every little thing is a big deal and needs to be discussed and debated and argued over. It doesn’t. I don’t have to be involved in everyone’s life story. I don’t have to take up every cause. I don’t have to weigh in on every issue. I don’t have to have an opinion on every tiny scandal that every politician gets himself into. Democracy isn’t hanging on my shoulders. The fate of the world doesn’t rest on how many people agree with me or how effectively I argue against someone else’s facts.
That’s very liberating. I’m old enough to remember what life was like before everyone around the globe was connected, before everyone had a voice, before everyone had the means of sharing that voice, before everyone had the means of responding to everyone else’s voices. I remember that we were happier. I remember that we were kinder to each other. I remember that we were more patient and tolerant of one another. I remember that we could discuss politics and world events without getting into fist fights or storming the capital to overthrow our government.
Social media has united us. It’s also divided us. I think the initial idea was brilliant. Connect the world. Give everyone a voice. Share ideas around the globe. Make the world smaller and more accessible. I think it was like that in the beginning. But then came the bots and the sock puppets and the trolls and the hackers. Social media gives everyone a voice, and that is both its greatest strength and its greatest weakness. More often than not, the rants and screams drown out the quiet and respectful dialogue, and that’s a real shame. As more government agencies jump in and use social media to shape and manipulate our thoughts, I believe it’s only going to get worse.
So no, I don’t miss it. The last 133 days have been wonderful. I’m happier. I’m more productive. I’m more focused on the things that matter most to me. I don’t see myself setting up accounts again any time soon. I realize this choice isn’t for everyone, but if you want to quiet your mind and simplify your life, it might be something you want to consider for yourself.
I feel personally attacked 😉. Great read. Well said.